Am I the Drama?
Click the button for a juicy confession...
☼ About Me
Hi. I’m Maria Rossi (yes like the wine or the mafia or whatever). I’m 16, I’m a Gemini, and I’m the oldest daughter — which basically means I’ve already lived a thousand lives in babysitting hours. I like glitter, trashy Y2K fashion, and being the most iconic girl in class 09. I’m not basic, I’m just better.
My pronouns are she/her, I’m straight (sorry), but obviously I support the girls, gays, and theys. I wear crosses even though I don’t go to church. Style first, theology second.
I live for music, Sims 4, leopard print, bedazzled flip phones, and that weird feeling when a lip gloss is too sticky but in a good way. I do all my own piercings and make CDs for my friends like it’s still 2003. You’re welcome.
✦ Quick Info
- Nicknames: Mari (Carter), Rossini (Samuel)
- Birthday: June 19 (buy me something)
- Zodiac: Gemini, obviously
- Height: 1.54m
- Aesthetic: Y2K × Hot Mess × Bratzcore
- Status: it’s complicated but he’s cute (hi Carter)
- Currently: listening to Ayesha Erotica and painting my nails
☁ Likes & Dislikes
Likes:
- Energy drinks
- Bratz & Monster High
- MC Bling and flip phones
- Playing Sims 4 for 6 hours straight
- Glitter eyeshadow
- CD burning like it’s the early 2000s
- My friends (even Samuel lol)
Dislikes:
- Being ignored
- Math
- Bad hair days
- Having no room to breathe
- People who call me dramatic (I’m passionate, okay?)
- My parents being gone all the time
- Feeling replaceable
♡ Friends, or Whatever
Carter is my neighbor and my not-boyfriend. He’s super hot, wears too much black, and says messed-up things in a hot way. We’re close. Like, really close. But don’t make it weird.
Scylla bakes witchy cookies and talks about plants like they have names. Their real name is James but like... don’t call them that unless you want a curse.
Samuel is Carter’s best friend. He’s broody and pale and probably hasn’t smiled since 2014. I think he secretly likes us, though.
Marcus is the anime one. He has beef with Samuel sometimes but I don’t get involved unless it’s funny.
♫ My Vibes
- Current anthem: “Yummy” by Ayesha Erotica
- Vibe: hot, tired, mildly evil
- Playlist title: "Songs for Pretty Girls With Problems"
👗 Outfit of the Day
Serving looks, no crumbs.
Previous Slays
💄 Hot Girl Tips Corner
Maria’s Hot Girl Tips: How to be iconic and unbothered.
Check the sidebar for my rotating tips to slay every day. Be the main character, always.
🔥 Hot Meter
Maria’s Hot Meter: How iconic is she today? (Spoiler: Always a 10.)
Today’s Hotness: Calculating...
💍 Mood Ring
Maria’s Mood Ring: Hover to see what vibe she’s on today!
🌟 Maria’s Fashion Horoscope 🌟
Style advice, reads, and delusions based on your sign. I am the authority.
♈ Aries (March 21 - April 19)
“If you dress like you’re ready to fight someone in the parking lot, that’s called fashion. Just don’t wear sneakers with EVERYTHING, babe.”
♉ Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
“You're hot but in a lazy way. Try wearing something besides that one hoodie you always ‘accidentally’ sleep in.”
♊ Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
“Two-faced? No. Two looks in one. Outfit changes mid-day are a lifestyle. So is lying about your birthday for free stuff.”
♋ Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
“Stop crying and fix your eyeliner. Smudged mascara is only hot if it’s intentional. Also you’re not as subtle as you think.”
♌ Leo (July 23 - August 22)
“You are the main character, but that crop top is holding on for dear life. Either commit to the drama or stay in bed.”
♍ Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
“Everything you wear matches. Congrats on being predictable. Add a rhinestone belt before I fall asleep.”
♎ Libra (September 23 - October 22)
“You’ll say ‘I have nothing to wear’ with 78 outfits on your bed. You’re cute, but you change your aesthetic like your lockscreen.”
♏ Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
“Wearing all black isn’t a personality. But you do look hot. Add a little blood-red lip and ruin a man’s life tonight.”
♐ Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
“You think you’re above trends but still wear low rise jeans ‘ironically.’ Chaos is your brand, and it’s kinda working.”
♑ Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
“You look like a girlboss intern with trauma. Your eyeliner’s sharp, your heels are louder than your feelings.”
♒ Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
“You dress like you’re going to a rave at 3pm. I respect the delusion. That outfit makes no sense and I’m INTO it.”
♓ Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
“You wore that skirt because it’s ‘dreamy.’ You also cried in the bathroom because someone looked at you weird. Add glitter and get revenge.”
✿ Style Guide
My look is trashy couture with extra glitter. I love a smokey eye, plucked brows, and foundation that’s maybe too orange. It’s giving Y2K mall princess.
Hair? Always teased, curled, extended, or in a messy half-up. Pinterest is my bible.
Clothes? If it looks like something a Bratz doll would wear to detention, I want it.
⚠ Life Stuff (Read or don’t idc)
My life is kind of chaotic. I live with three younger siblings and parents who are never home. So I end up doing everything, from bedtime to microwaving dinosaur nuggets. It sucks but I also don’t trust anyone else to do it right.
I have... some issues. Like, I fake being confident a lot. And I get scared people only want me for looks or attention. But whatever. I’m funny and hot and people like me, so it balances out. Probably.
✎ Misc.
- Fav color: Pink or glitter (yes it counts)
- Fav game: Sims 4 duh
- Fav scent: Watermelon lip gloss + something kinda toxic
- Secret talent: Can bedazzle literally anything
- HTML skill: mid but getting better
- Fear: not being enough
Cliquespace 2K – running on ✨spite✨ and outdated code
You’re #: 000069
no one's real anyway
Who's behind the 404?